The Vegan Club

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Thursday, July 20, 2006

And there is something as bad!!!!

Did you think that the meat cuts stuffed toys were the bottom of human perversion towards animal? Hold on for a minute... there is worse. Or at least something AS BAD!
And what could it be? What can actually be worst than meat plushes??? If I had to answer this question without knowing what I actually just found, I would not know what to bet on... maybe meat shaped furniture?!!! Clothes? Cars?
It is worse than that!
Have a look... Bacon And Eggs bandages!!!! Are the meat eaters seriously so degenerate?!?!!
Why? How? When? WHO would want to wear bacon and egg shaped bandages??? I seriously have no clue... all I can say are the reasons why, once again this is not only not cool.... but totally crazy!


Reasons why if you want these, there may be something wrong with you...

-you actually are a vegan and think that via your skin, some B12 can be tranfered right into your blood from these: do not know what to tell you.... beside for this: get a shrink!

-you are a new veg*n terribly missing meat : you again??? I thought you got your fix already with the meat toys! You still miss meat so much? I am afraid veg*nism is not for you buddy! Go back to your meat eating diet and clear the scene from fakers, will ya?

-your wife is a veggie and so are your kids: you hope to instill in them some love for meat by using this bandages on their cuts and telling me "let the pretty bacon take care of you"... give up buddy! your wife will win the battle and you know it! Your kids already hate meat! The only thing you have left to do is to veg yourself: you know you want it.

-you loooove meat, your drool over it, but no bacon and no eggs these days: you need to loose 150 pounds! Hence, this visual substitute. Well my friend, if you had learnt that only animal products had cholesterole in, maybe you would have not helped yourself to those triple portions or bacon+sauges+ribs+eggs (of course) every single morning.... and now would have not to diet to save your life... We strongly advise you going veggie: your diet (and your cholesterole) would go so much better! Plus, let me remind you one more time, vegan boys are in high demand! (and this can actually even help you pump your post diet self esteem!)

-you think these are pretty and more original than the regular bandages: you surely are right. These are more original! But unfortunately people will not look at you in awe when wearing this: who would want to actually place fried eggs and bacon on skin? On wounded skin?? No sorry, these are not pretty. And if you did not understand the last time, let me show you where these are from and you will agree with me.

-you have the bizzarre need to get meat and eggs straight into your bloodstream: since you were unable to do tha using the real food version, you are trying with the bandages. This person is suicidal, please someone call a mental detention centre now! You really want fat and cholesterole from a corpse to enter in you? Jeez....

I feel dirty just at the idea of putting a slab of bacon on my arm, fake or otherwise.... and I am just not really sure in which direction this world is going! Is this some sort of secret conspiracy to pass on the message that meat is good? Anything I am missing here?

Anyhow, rejoice! After all this ugliness, a veggie hero is just coming you way... (check next post!)

And yeah, if you really need to know, these are from SproutHome.com (I thought it to be a pretty unlikely place to find meat supporters, but apparently I was wrong...).

11 Comments:

Blogger Danielle said...

Oy. I've seen bacon stickers at the tchotchke section of the Target in Rockville, Maryland. I see those and I think WHY? What purpose does this serve. But bandages shaped like bacon and eggs? Egad.

2:57 am  
Blogger Urban Vegan said...

Whatever happened to cartoon character bandages? I think we should get some made in the shape of tempeh strips, carrots, and Toffuti Cuties.

4:14 am  
Blogger Ferocious Killer Kat said...

I couldnot stop laughing at this stuff.. just like how I could not stop laughing today when a colleague told me that he is going on atkins diet.. and how he was boasting by saying he can eat 3 cheese hamburgers just for breakfast and not gain weight.. and I said yea rite.. when u will be off atkins u will gain double the weight u lost and your cholesterol will be > 400!! I cannot believe how stupid humans can get!

6:29 am  
Blogger Vicki said...

simply nasty. anonymous on your last post would love a flesh bandage.

10:39 pm  
Blogger KleoPatra said...

Ugh! Ugh! Ugh! I've seen those at Archie McPhee... just awful, really. But funny in a way. I can imagine the looks one would get wearing either of these brands. I thought it was cute when I saw the Band-Aid folks made Scooby-Doo and Spider-Man bandages... this is just kinda gross to me!

8:18 pm  
Blogger Melody said...

Just when you think you've seen it all..

11:55 pm  
Blogger Dori said...

YUCK! No slab of fatty meat hanging around on my body. Why? I can handle butterflies, worms, and even spiderman.... but not bacon and eggs.

6:30 am  
Blogger jessica said...

that is very wacky,
someone who needs attention badly would wear it.

6:49 pm  
Blogger primaryconsumer said...

Hello, I got your comment on my blog. I must have forgotten about that, I've been so busy. I do like the button, I just have one question: how do I put it on my blog? Thanks!

11:02 pm  
Anonymous tara said...

That is just way too weird....

1:45 am  
Blogger Catherine said...

I saw an ad for these recently ...just what were they thinking?

7:34 am  

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Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened. Anatole France